If a Wildebeest could watch
the six o’clock news,
would it be any different
from me and you?
I present this story as if it were true…
A Wildebeest watches the six oclock news,
his horns sit idly
on the table nearby.
Got his feet up,
drinkin’ a beer,
eating chips and dip.
His window on the world
is frosted,
more translucent than clear,
I fear,
even though it is wide screen,
full colour, high definition.
The news watching Wildebeest turns to his missus
and grunts disapproval, loudly dismisses
some idiot leader, with horns in a knot
‘bout one of the others, who’s just been shot.
“Maw..” says the Wildebeest,
(missus nods her head
to the only word ever
any Wildebeest said.)
“Maw…” and he thinks, “We can stop running now,
Great White Hunter’s busy with that old cow,
let’s browse more chow.”
Then, later, while flipping to channel two
he learns yet another of many, not few’s
been lion caught,
they’re chewing him through and through.
“Whew!”
he would say if he could,
“Those blood thirsty bastards don’t mean any good!”
But he doesn’t say, “Whew,”
he’s unable to do,
so he just says,
“Maw…”
(to the missus, who nods her head.
It’s the only word ever
a wildebeest said.)
Robert On The Air 